The Neck, The Bikini & Keeping It Real at 53

 

BLOG POST — The Neck, The Bikini & Keeping It Real at 53

So… the chicken neck has started. Or the turkey neck. Or whatever Nora Ephron called it — because if you’ve read anything by her, you’ll know she talks about the moment you wake up and suddenly your neck has changed. And she was right. One morning it’s just… there.

Nora also wrote about bikinis — how when you’re young, you have the best body you’ll ever have, and that’s exactly when you cover it up. That line became a kind of mantra for me. I wear the bikini now because I didn’t when I was younger. I didn’t see bodies like mine in magazines at 14. No one told me to take up space. No one told me I was allowed to.

And I’m not body‑conscious now. Not really. (Okay, Vegas gave me a moment — that bikini did not fit — but still.) I love my form. I love my body. I’ll probably wear a bikini until I’m ancient. Why wouldn’t I?

But the neck… that’s new. I’ve started waking up with lines on my chest, and my neck is just a little looser. Nothing dramatic — just different. And because it’s new, it’s noticeable. That’s the ND thing: any change throws you for a minute, then you adjust and it becomes normal.

I don’t see myself ever having surgery. I exercise, but not for tone — for dopamine. My brain needs the hit. Exercise gives me the lift that other people get naturally. Art does it too. Movement and making — that’s my medicine.

And then there’s the scarf. I’ve always worn neck scarves. Diane Keaton energy. Air‑hostess chic. Virgin Atlantic glamour. I think I loved the uniform long before I understood what it represents. Maybe it was the neatness, the importance, the icing on the cake, the finishing, the neck scarf gives that to any look. Maybe it was the way it draws attention up to the face — not the chest. I’ve spent too many years with men talking to my breasts instead of my eyes. No thanks.

So yes, the scarf might become more of a thing again. Not to hide — just to style. To own it. To play with it. To make the change mine instead of something happening to me.

I’m 53. This is the age where things start shifting. And honestly? I’m fine with that. I’ve not noticed many changes until now — nothing that bothered me anyway. Natural beauty changes don’t scare me. Pretending I’m not ageing would be the ridiculous part.

What is interesting is how many older women we’re finally seeing on TV — real faces, real necks, real hands. Women who look like what I will look like. Women who make ageing visible instead of shameful.

So here it is — keeping it real, as always. A little wobble, a little honesty, a little Nora Ephron wisdom. The neck has arrived. And the show goes on.

FOOTNOTE

Educated ME – LOVE her work.

Nora Ephron References 

1. “I Feel Bad About My Neck” (2006)

This is the book where she writes the iconic line about the neck arriving overnight. She also talks about hands in this collection — the way they age before the rest of you.

2. “I Feel Bad About My Neck: And Other Thoughts on Being a Woman”

Same book, but worth noting the subtitle because it’s the one people recognize. The hands essay is in here too — she talks about how hands betray age even when everything else is holding up.

3. “I Remember Nothing” (2010)

This one doesn’t have the bikini essay, but it continues the theme of ageing with her trademark wit.

4. “Crazy Salad” (1975) — for the bikini reference

This is where she writes about the idea that when you’re young, you have the best body you’ll ever have — and that’s exactly when you cover it up. That’s the line you’re referencing. It’s classic Ephron: funny, painful, true.

Also here I am a  juxtaposition - I love and Loathe a uniform.